Excitment is in the Air..

Hello!!!
I have exciting news! On July 25 I got engaged and am getting married on Nov. 30th of this year! Wow..I am so happy this is coming up soon. Only 53 more days left! Cannot wait to go put on my dress again for a fitting and for the big day to come. In 2 weeks my fiance, Cole, and I go home for our wedding shower and for my dress fitting. Plus to do some errands for our wedding plans. :) I cannot wait to see friends and family again and get to spend time with them. Well..so far, our planning is coming together..and how could they not? We have amazing families who have helped us so much with it all. Nov. 30th is going to be the best day of my life..getting to marry my best friend and love of my life. :)
Man, I could just ramble on and on about wedding plans and such! I guess it's the excitement. Well..other things have been going on other than planning. Right now I am stuck at a stand still..I have been looking all over for a job and applied at numerous places, and still I have not heard from anyone. It's so frustrating but I guess I have to give it all to God so He can help me find a job. Prayer is much appreciated.

Love janie

Back again..

Hey my lovely followers, how few there are of you..oh well!Want to know what's been going on with me? Well..I was busy with my last year of Uni, which I failed, hence why it was my last year. But I am beginning again at Confederation College through their online learning. I'm taking the Hospital Ward Clerk program to get some education for when I am working at the hospital in Thunder Bay! Which I hope I have a job there this fall.
I am currently enjoying the quiet sounds of nature out at Highwind Lake Camp, which is a camp ground my grandparents own and run! I'm their hired hand this summer and will be spending the entire summer out here! YAY! Cole has just started his first trip for work today..but thankfully after not seeing him for over a month, I get to see him in 10days! Exciting exciting! It's going to be a tough 10 days being so anxious to see him, I'm going to have a hard time keeping on track with things that need to be done while I'm so busy being excited that he's coming! :)
Anyways, I am about to go for a nice long run! Can't wait to feel the burn in my legs and lungs from a good sweat inducing run. Maybe I'll add some other muscle building exercises in there too. :p

Love you all!

- janie

Painting...

Hello all!
So I have begun to paint again and it's been a long time since I did so. I bought canvas a while ago but my paints and brushes have been at Cole's house for the past 2 months so every time I've had the urge to paint, well my paints weren't here. Finally, after quite some time, I remembered to bring home my paints and brushes, put my easel together, and mixed up some colors. Well, so far so good! My hands have been covered in paint but thankfully it's all easy to wash off, gotta love acrylic paints. Right now I'm working on a painting with Lady Slipper flowers on it. :) I must say, it's one of my best! And that's saying something, considering I'm not all that good. I hope to finish it all before Christmas, for sure. Or before I leave to go home for Christmas, at the earliest. Wouldn't a painting make a great Christmas gift for my friend Marsha? I think so! I just hope she'll love it.
Well..time to watch some LOST!

love janie

I'm baaaaaaack....

Hello followers,
I know it has been quite some time..again. I seem to forget about my blog when I'm busy at school. Well, I have been struggling with school this year..and when I say struggling, I mean that it's eating me alive. I never thought I would have this much trouble with school, and with a program I was so pumped for. Now I just feel like God is making me fail so I will change my direction of schooling. Its very discouraging to study for hours, feel so prepared, write the exam, feel good about how I did, then find out 3 weeks later that all my efforts still managed to land me a failing mark. Out of the 8 midterms that I had, I have only passed 1..and I have yet to find out about one more. So..as you can see, I have become confused, frustrated, angry, sad, and left feeling hopeless. People keep saying to "try harder", and "keep trying", "maybe your not studying enough", "maybe this isn't the program for you"when all I want to say is...please stop talking! I have tried my hardest and I have studied for hours and maybe this isn't the program for me but that doesn't give an reason why I'm failing when I've tried so hard to succeed! Maybe God is failing me to show me that psychology isn't for me, maybe He's trying to tell me that I need to try harder, maybe He's trying to tell me that I'm not ready for this..it's just a whole bunch of maybe's and I have no idea which one is right. I have prayed over and over again, before, during and after writing exams.
I have looked into a different career choice, Hospital Ward clerk/Secretary..which seems to be quite a good job. I get to learn medical terminology, how to re-write doctor's notes and file things, and also how to check patients in and out. It would be fun to learn and a fun/interesting area to work in. Maybe this is what God wants.
Prayers much needed, please.

love janie

Babies..

So, my boyfriend's sister gave birth to a beautiful baby boy on July 5th at around 7:15pm. His name is Landon. It felt so amazing to hold his tiny little day old body in my arms. It also made me long for the day I have my first baby. Now..early this morning my cousin's wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl; her name is Avery. Hearing this news just made me long even more for the day I am pregnant with my first child, and my second, and my third, and maybe a fourth! But I think I am more looking forward to having Cole by my side while I struggle through the hormones and emotional strain of pregnancy. And I cannot wait to have him by my side helping me through the labour then his excitement when the doctor says I can push this little being out of me. I reeeeeeaaaaaaalllllyyyyy cannot wait to see the love and happiness on Cole's face when he's holding that tiny little baby. The adoration and pride when he looks at me after that baby is born will most likely bring me to tears. Although I will be so exhausted and emotionally strained from the painful labour that I probably would cry in an instant. I'll be an emotional reck when I give birth! But..all the pain and stress on my body will be completely and totally worth it. Who wouldn't give anything to have God place a child inside them and watch as their stomach grew bigger and bigger as God made this tiny little being develope into a baby? Who wouldn't feel complete joy that they get to bring life into the world and feel the honor and excitement of the journey ahead? Well..I know that I cannot wait until that journey, especially with God on one side and Cole on the other. Both right beside me, helping me along the way. It will be amazing!

love janie

Surprises...

Hello!
My youngest sister, Kirstie, graduated on June 22, 2012..which was a Friday. And on that amazing day, during the busy hour of makeup and dressing..my wonderful, handsome man, Cole, comes to my parent's house to surprise me. Little did I know he was there until my Mom so descretely calls me away from the bathroom to "help her with something" only to come into the kitchen to see that wonderul, handsome mad standing there with the most amazing smile on his gorgeous face. Without even thinking I screamed and ran into his waiting arms..not even caring that my butt might be hanging out of my dress. I could feel his shaking from pure happiness as he held me against him. I forgot to mention that everyone in my family knew he was coming, for almost 2 weeks! and only 10 minutes prior to this surprise, my Dad was asking me if I knew if Cole would be coming out to visit his family before school started. Hahahahah sneaky family. And I am still so astonished that I got to hug, kiss, cuddle, smile, laugh, and cry with Cole during the few days I had with him. By the way..all the crying was done by me, all the antisipation of him leaving again made me so emotion the day before he had to bus back to Thunder Bay.
On Friday night, Cole and I had driven back to his parent's place to stay the night and to see his Dad before we headed to Kenora on Saturday afternoon. We got to spend a lovely 3hours in my new car on the drive to Kenora. We got to spend some time here at my Grandparent's house. And I'm guessing that while I was busy at some point in the day..he was able to secretly hide little notes in my day planner, in my pillow case, on my mirror and just on my bed. He also smothered the sweater I have of his in his deoderant so I can smell him aaaaaaaaallll night while I cuddled with it. All the notes and smells of him help me to hold on to the reality that he was actually here, that he actually came and surprised me. Even now that I think about it, the moment I came into the kitchen turned into a blur after I screamed and jumped into his open arms. :)
I am the luckiest girl alive.

love janie

Lost..

So..I know many people have watched the show LOST, well..I just started. And it is, in a sense, addicting! It's addicting because you want to know when these people will be rescued, when one of the monsters will come and get them, what everyone is thinking each day that they aren't rescued and what are all the secrets of each person's life before the plane crash. Well..as I watch this, I notice that while I am so interest in what everyone has done in the past or what brought them to be on this plane..I think about how glad I am that I wasn't on that plane! I think about what I would do if I was one of those people. Well..I believe that I would be freaking out! Then I would be crying out to God to save me, or at least help me to calm down. And somewhere in the back of my mind I would be wishing I was one of the many people who did not survive the crash. Especially because living on a dangerous, creepy, unknown island would make me think of how wonderful Heaven would be at this very moment; how much better it would be. But, because I had survived, I would focus my energy on surviving and building my relationship with God. I would do what I could to be supportive and helpful but also in some way help bring pease to those through God. Another significant thought, no matter how lost I would be to the rest of the world, I would never be lost to God. He would know exactly where I was. :)
But, the more I watch this show, I realize in a way..I am lost. I realize that there are times in my walk with Christ that I feel completely confused and lost. I don't know what to do or how to act; what my choices are or what it is that God wants me to do. I feel lost because I can't hear God, I don't get signs from Him for what I should be doing! Especially when it comes to what path I should choose in my future career..do I go on to get a Masters degree in Psych or do I go on to become a guidance counsiler..well..I have no idea! Although, I do trust and know that it some way, God will help me with my choices, whether making me fail an exam or pass one. Or giving me words of widsom for an important essay or soemthing; in one way or another, He will help me through my lost moments and give me understanding. If I gambler, I would bet my life that God will help me through anything. And because I know God loves me, even with all my baggage; He will bring me on His path that He has made for me. I will never be lost with my Father by my side.

love janie